on Breasts

Thy two breasts are like two young roes that are twins, which feed among the lilies.
~Song of Solomon, 4:5

The problems about men talking about breasts is that we will never get it right.

In fact, any man attempting to say anything beyond “It’s nice…” is pretty much screwed.

As a general rule, you should avoid any discussion on the shape, colour, texture or any other characteristics of a girl’s anatomy. Size, is totally off limit.

Generally, girls would like to be appreciated for their brain, bright ideas and intellectual capacity – much like the rest of us. They would like men to go ga ga not over their breasts.

Except that we do. Men do notice breasts. We can’t help it. All men.

I think it has a lot to do with the fact that men don’t have them. It’s an exotic idea – the most visual physical characteristics between the two species: one has breasts and the others don’t.
I honestly think men are hard wired to notice breasts.

I was at the DVD shop the other night and the DVD Guy has two of his nails almost 10 cm long. I immediately noticed that because my nails are the same as everyone else.

Men notice breasts because we don’t have them and therefore we never really know what to do with them.

The latter is often a problem but we’re not going there at this point.
I asked the male members of the Jedi Council – if anyone had problems with ‘fake’ breasts. A few had problems with the idea of an alien object intimately embedded between them and their lovers. Some men have no problems with corrective and elective modifications, so long as it doesn’t involve any foreign object being inserted anywhere. I don’t really get that. What’s the fuss? Are the concerns environmentally related? (green breasts sounds less sexy).

I personally can’t see why it is a problem. A woman’s body is hers to do as she pleases.
Girls change their hair a lot – different colours and different cuts and different wigs – often to suit their moods. I know girls who change their hair almost weekly – ask Olive.
They put different make up and different clothes and yet, we love them first thing in the morning at their best.

I don’t understand why we should object to breasts modification (we’re talking within the reasonable boundaries here, not exactly 42DDD). For me, I don’t even count in the equation, it’s none of my business. It would be nice to be involved in the decision – so at least it wouldn’t be too much of a wonderful surprise – and there’s always the risk that I would be disappointed in the result, but generally, it is not really my decision to make.

While we were still together, Lita talked about getting a boob job. She was 22 and looking fabulous, I couldn’t figure out why she wanted to change anything about her look.
And yet, she never failed to notice that her boobs ‘didn’t look right in that dress’.

She later had them done in LA and I saw the result about a year ago when she first returned. I thought they looked great, but it could’ve been just the dress. I do find her rather spectacularly beautiful. Did I like it better than before?
I’m not sure. I don’t know.

It was different, but I’m not sure if it was better or worse. It made her happier and that made her a more pleasant person (she was a very nice person to start with) – and for me that kinda counts for a lot.

Speaking from experience, you could spend years and years with a person and never really got to know her for real. It seems superficial to assume that silicone implants somewhat change a person. They’re not even yours, so you don’t actually have a vote for it. It’s not that size doesn’t matter, you just do different things with them.

I don’t think I actually answered the question, Why Do Men Like Tits. This post in Rantlust is a very, very good reference material and addressed most parts of the answer (Freudian theories, evolutionary biology as well as feminist revolution and cultural changes). You should just read that one.


NOTE: Me and Anita agreed to work on this post together – starting as an open ended question – and she has her own post on the subject.

NOTE #2: The art I stole from Allan Deas - a London based artist with great wonderful works.